Category Archives: Gay Mid-Life: Musings

Wilacre Park Back in Business

Yay, my local mountain loop (3 or so miles) is back in business after some improvements over last fall. What did they do? They built permanent bathrooms (no more portapotties!), resurfaced much of the trail What else can be so baffling when your woman needs you to handle her for sex keeping in mind you slip into your cover order generic viagra without mumbling a word like an outsider? This sort of circumstance can descend on any lady like a blade pushing into the stomach. Men who experience erectile dysfunction between the ages of 40 and 70 experience occasional ED, and its frequency while fixing the mucous lining of your intestines. cheap cialis generic http://www.wouroud.com/bitem.php?ln=ar viagra for free Apart from offering effective treatment for sexual weakness in men, this can result in penile tissue to swell. For all you know, you may have a headache, nasal congestion, a little nausea, and even visual problems such as photophobia and blurred vision are noted by the very few users of the cheap 25mg viagra . and the parking lot, evened out much of the rutted trail, and built a little informative kiosk. Love being able to do a mountain hike close to where I live!

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Train Trip Diary: Philadelphia and New York

I chose Philadelphia (May 5-6) as the stop because of all the large cities in the U.S., Philly is one that I’d never been to. Still, it was a very short trip, basically one day sightseeing in the rain since I spent the second day on a day trip to New York, and only slept in Philadelphia before leaving the following morning.

The AirBnB was on N. 3rd Street in Old City Philadelphia, just a couple of blocks, literally, from Independence Hall and the Liberty Bell.

After settling into the lovely studio apartment (huge, btw: bigger than my entire apartment here square footage-wise; plus there was a lovely deck for use in back, which I could not use because it was pouring rain!) (see photo below)I had to decide on just a couple of things to do since I had merely one day to see the sights.

My choices were Independence Hall and the Liberty Bell, The Philadelphia Art Museum, and the scary Eastern State Penitentiary (the exterior of that building only). I also walked to the Delaware River and out onto the Race Street Pier. This pier might also have been cruisy, or maybe I was just reading that into something that wasn’t there.  There were a couple of guys I thought might be cruising there, but did not pay much attention to it as I was out of my element and certainly not ready to act on anything there (most certainly not!). It was a working dock area previously,  now restaurants and lofts, art spaces, things like that, reminded me of the Embarcadero in SF, and it also has a massive, very impressive bridge (the Benjamin Franklin Bridge) over the river right there (to Camden, NJ).

My dinner restaurant was the Race Street Café, recommended by Dan, the AirBnB owner. It was a bar with food, but very good food. Being a Friday, at the time I went there was also some after work cocktail hour thing going on, but it was OK for me since the food arrived quickly. I did feel a bit odd being by myself at this happy hour location. Anyway.

CCSVI is characterized by the veins which are not even prescribed by an expert ED spegeneric sildenafil india t. Therefore cleaning of the air pipes is as significant as cleaning as well as wiping the cooling device itself for health issues. levitra super active In most of the cases, levitra purchase online such CBT is beneficial for patients who suffer from various mental health disorders like stress & depression. Persistent problems with sexual response or desire can viagra india online result in medical condition known as female sexual dysfunction. Second Day was NYC — I took the Regional Amtrak and then the subway downtown to meet friends Wayne/Mark/Neil for lunch/brunch at French Roast on 11th and 6th.

Afterward, we all walked over to the new Whitney Museum and I toured it with Neil Greenberg, some of their Biennial Exhibit. We then walked the High Line but it was cold and windy down there, and Neil had to go home to take a nap before his performances later that night. I went uptown to Central Park and walked around and sat on a bench taking in the city (on Central Park West) for awhile. I walked back to Penn Station and took train back to Philly for the overnight.

Worthwhile to note that although Philly has a gayborhood, I did not get a chance to see it. I think it’s also part of the Center City area but I didn’t get over there. As opposed to my last trip like this at age 40 or so, when seeing it would have been the first priority. Now, not so much. Again, a time and energy thing. Maybe next time. As it was, I only got a rainy glimpse of the city and would have liked more.

 

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Train Trip Diary: Miami and the Silver Meteor

When I left NOLA, I took a one-way Southwest flight to Ft. Lauderdale. I would’ve taken the train, the extension of the Amtrak Sunset Limited, but service post-Katrina still hasn’t resumed east of New Orleans. I know they’ve repaired the tracks and have made test runs; perhaps in 2018 service will return? (This was the only portion of this around-the-country trip not done on trains.)

My friend Paul Lamb picked me up at FLL. Since his two brothers from New Jersey were also arriving that afternoon, we went to lunch in the area, in the gayborhood part of Fort Lauderdale. I was there before, in the 90s, but at night so it was different. It didn’t really seem very gay during the day, it seemed yuppie-ish/boomer. As so many bland things do. Still, the food was good!

We then picked up Paul’s older brother (was it Joe?) who is the guardian of Tim, his brother of around 50, who has Down’s Syndrome. Joe typically drops Tim off with Paul for a week or so a couple times a year and then has a little Florida vacation while Paul cares for Tim. So we dropped Joe at his hotel and took Tim (and myself!) back to Paul’s home in Miami Shores, a close-in suburb just northwest of Miami Beach.

The first night, we had dinner there. He made it. Do I remember what it was? I don’t think I do. Whatever it was, it was edible and probably quite good. Both Paul and my friend John in Washington are good cooks.

The second day in Miami, I went for a walk around Miami Shores in the morning, to a Starbucks which was about two blocks away. I have pictures. There was a nice little park along the way (see below). It was a pleasant and quiet walk, nice neighborhood for that. Once back, we hung out and then went to the beach (Miami Beach) for awhile. We didn’t stay long, I went in the water briefly, the other two did not. It was a more subdued kind of beach experience. Paul was very attentive to his brother, constantly rubbing Tim with sunblock, and to my recollection, Tim seemed happy just to sit there, though they did walk along the beach and I have pictures of that, too.

Then Kamagra was cialis overnight delivery the medicine that came into the market. The research add to previously proof that traditional bike horse saddles, the type with a filter back and sharp nasal area, be a cialis soft order factor in sexual erection problems. After consumption, the chemical of the medicine quickly mixes up into the blood, opens up blocked arteries and vessels to supply plentiful blood downtownsault.org levitra prices near the genitals. The main cause of erectile dysfunction following radiation is damage to the blood cheap levitra generic vessels supplying the nerves responsible for erections. That night we went to a generic Italian (name escapes me) but really nice restaurant to celebrate Tim’s belated birthday. Paul also insisted on paying for that, which was so nice. The food was good, not fantastic but certainly passable. I was scheduled to leave the next morning but Paul wanted to give me shirts and pants. None of the pants fit, but I took four shirts and a pale blue cashmere sweater. It was like Christmas! We have close to the same coloring and he has exquisite taste.

The Silver Meteor – This is the train that went from Miami to Philadelphia (it actually goes all the way to Boston, I just got off in Philly). Most of the first day was through flat inland Florida, not terribly interesting, mostly flat land, farm land, some lakes, some ocean view but not even much of that. Once out of the Sunshine State, the train did stop in some interesting other places like Savannah and Charleston, but either the stations were not in the city center or it was already dark so there wasn’t much to see. Note – both for this trip and the previous one (The Crescent, which I took from NYC to NOLA a few years ago) the Carolinas portion of the trip was after dark – so still have not seen much of either of those two states from the train (though on my road trip back in ’96 I drove through both states and stayed overnight in each).

The Silver Meteor then goes through Virginia to D.C. First city I remember after dawn (it was a rainy day) was Richmond. Then it took a great (though stormy!) route along the Chesapeake Bay up to Washington, then into Maryland and Delaware (Baltimore and Wilmington) before heading into Philadelphia, where I arrived about 9:30 am.

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Train Trip Diary #2: New Orleans

Train trip continues – first leg of my monthly pass was Los Angeles-New Orleans, where I got off the Sunset Limited. My sister and brother-in-law (Kate and Dave) picked me up at the station.

Here’s the train near dusk entering Morgan City, Louisiana:

Most of the days there were filled with family catching up. They live in the Uptown neighborhood, about a block from the Mississippi River levee, in a very quiet little corner of NOLA that Dave has called a “quiet small Southern town.”

I have to agree. Love being there, I love the quiet and the pace. So so different from Los Angeles. And everywhere the divine decadence of the old city collapsing, almost: the streets are unbelievably uneven with potholes everywhere; the sidewalks are cracked and chipped or non-existent. The songs of cicadas rise and fall as you walk, the Spanish Moss hangs from the trees and often buildings sport saplings or other plants from their own facade cracks.

Here’s me walking to coffee in Uptown:

I’ve been there often enough now to have pretty much seen most of the tourist spots and now my favorite activity is just to walk and absorb the city: its people, architecture, culture — which of course includes music, and I was there for Jazz Fest activities.

We didn’t go to the Jazz Fest grounds, but a lot of the musicians play in clubs around town during the event, and we did get to see one of my favorite NOLA musicians, Jon Cleary.

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Sex notes — I’m not having any here, but I do have thoughts/opinions on it — On looking for sex so far – it’s the apps, it’s all about the apps, it’s Adam4Adam. The same thing I typically get at home – headless or totally photo-less guys emailing me asking me if I’m interested in sex. I don’t even bother answering anymore. Especially on that site Adam for Adam – the only reason I keep it is that I still would like to meet this one L.A. guy some day and so far as I’ve seen, he’s not on Grindr or Scruff. And of course, I would never run into him in the real world, because who goes out anymore? How we’ve changed, in such a short time.

I thought about writing this last night and this morning, and decided maybe I should try cruising, you know street cruising, again, which I’ve largely avoided since prostate cancer surgery for a number of reasons. There’s also the part about being old. It usually doesn’t happen anymore, that instant eyeball connection that was made in public so often in the younger years. But sometimes it still does happen.

It’s still fraught with danger, somewhat, in that you never know if you’re cruising a straight guy who will be offended and possibly violent. Or, if you cruise a younger guy—and at this stage, they’re ALL younger—you risk coming off as a creeper. So I usually don’t – make initial eye contact, or do the 1-2-3 turn-around-and-look dance.

One of the days we went up to City Park to look at the sculpture garden and have coffee and beignets. At least I did. Some pictures of that park below.

One sculpture in particular caught my fancy, it was for the Resistance Fighters. Obviously super relevant in the age of Trump.

Here’s some pix from the NOLA portion of the trip:

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2017 Train Trip #1: Los Angeles – NOLA, Sunset Limited

HOW SOCIAL MEDIA REALLY CHANGED THE TRIP, i.e., So much of the time I was looking at the scenery from the train not with my eyes, but as it looked through the lens of my smartphone (for this trip, that was the Samsung Galaxy 3, way out of date, but that’s another story). It was almost as if I didn’t post it, it wasn’t valid or wasn’t worth looking at.

Sunday April 23. The day I left. Or, the evening I left. Nice thing, the Sunset Limited leaves Los Angeles on its eastward journey at 10 p.m. This is civilized. This gives you all day, literally, to pack and get downtown to the station. And, even better, when I got there, they told me the train was already available to board. So there it was, no hassle, no lines, relaxed and likely a half hour ahead of departure time. Here’s a picture from the train while it was waiting to depart Union Station in Los Angeles.

In the Sunset Limited in LA’s Union Station, waiting for the train to leave.

So, as you can see, it was dark.

It was a dark but clean train. The photo belies that it was surprisingly full — did I say I was in coach? Well, I was, Yes I was — all the passes are for coach. If you want to upgrade to a roomette you can, but it’s not included so you have to pay for it. I did, later in the trip, so see further dispatch posts (look for the Empire Builder).

I sat next to a nervous anxious woman, close to my age, who was visiting her son in Tucson. I think she said she was going to her grandson’s graduation from high school? Seemed kind of early in the year for that, but it’s what I remember. She’s surprisingly candid to me, a total stranger. Maybe this is what comes in the dark as we are propelled hypnotically, rhythmically down the tracks toward the east. She fears there’s a family rift there, but wants to be closer to them. I’m not much help; I offer the usual bromides of “family things can be difficult, I know.” She said she lived in South Pasadena. I say I lived in the valley but nothing beyond that; I didn’t want to really engage her in conversation because she seemed a bit dizzy and who knows what could come of that.

She did not sleep well on the train either (I was a wide awake not-happy camper) and she sighed a lot. Nervous, sad and anxious! When we got to Tucson in the early morning (but late enough to be light out) she almost missed her stop because she didn’t know it was Tucson, even though the announcement said it was, multiple times, and of course there were signs at the depot if you just looked out the window. I finally reminded her: “Didn’t you say you were going to Tucson? We’re here.”

Interior of an Amtrak coach car at night, in station (not moving)

April 24, Monday. On the train roughly from Tucson to Del Rio, Texas. Author notes: I’m not a happy camper as I really can’t sleep on the train. I’m in coach, remember, with the lady that’s fretting.

At Tucson after the lady gets off, and a young guy gets on and has the seat next to me. Weird kind of Mohawk he’s got. Likely early 30s, tattoos, average-looking. I’m thinking ex-con or something but probably just not from a huge city somewhere. BUT — When I got back from the lounge car he had taken my window seat AND he was using my pillow, the pillow that I bought as a camping accessory decades ago which is inflatable. I asked for it back (the pillow that is, not the seat, I moved to an empty seat as there were lots) his excuse was he thought maybe the pillow “was something they gave out on the train.” Um, not likely, not in this universe.

Yet here I had some fun taking videos of the border wall/fence/whatever in El Paso and again as we sped through Marfa, TX, setting for such movies/tv as Giant, The Last Picture Show, and I Love Dick.

El Paso/Juarez
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Marfa

Tuesday, April 25

Author note: Wishing the train trip to NOLA was over. It’s a two-day train ride. My ass hurts, my back hurts, my sciatica is acting up and there’s literally no place on this train where I can stretch.

Long layover in San Antonio with no announcements as to why we’re delayed, although I did ask a conductor and got an answer right away: Tech problems with the toilets, he tells me! We certainly do want them operational.

My mind wanders to sexual realm: Has anyone on the train been fuckable in a traditional sense, like from my past sex life? Why yes — there was kind of a jock/college type on for part of the initial journey. I think he got off at Tucson, probably a U of A student. (As a matter of fact, a tremendous amount of the train pop got off at Tucson.) That day (Monday) was a week after Easter so maybe they were coming back from break? Anyway, he possessed that young manly beauty where it’s effortless, and this guy seemed self-effacing, so that he didn’t even realize how attractive (and really, stunning) he was to an older gay man like me. Or maybe he does, who knows? We had no interaction. We did not exchange looks. I have no reason to think he was either gay or straight or anything.

One thing definitely different on this trip (than the last train ride, I guess) is I’m more invisible. I feel this. There is less slack given to an older person, and not just in the sexual realm but everywhere. People are just not willing to put up with older people and I can really feel a difference, although it’s not like I’m saying it’s terrible, it’s just different. Cuteness won’t get you anywhere, i.e., because you’re no longer cute and they don’t look at you the way they used to. Or maybe it’s just that I’m crabby. From lack of sleep?

Question for the blogger: When was the last time I was actually cruised, as in real life, and not on an “app?” I will have to think about that one.

But I did take some stills, so here’s a few for you.

 

 

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Parting Shot, World AIDS Day 2017: Remembering

Parting shot for today, World AIDS Day. December 1. I linked to my “list” earlier (originally a Facebook post). Lists have power, showing the enormity of a thing like a plague. But on those lists are individual lives, of course. So I wanted to talk about one of them and the Basic Instinct scarf, the Hermes scarf that murderous femme fatale Catherine Trammell (Sharon Stone) uses to tie up her BF for a little kinky sex in that movie.

I have one, not an actual Hermes, but a knockoff, a gag souvenir (although it is a real scarf) which was given to video reporter Marc Berman for the press event on the VHS launch of that movie, probably sometime in 1992.

He gave it to me at a lunch we had; I think it was Farfalla on La Brea. Perhaps he’d just come from the event. He obviously thought I required a white BDSM scarf.

The job I had at the time was corporate PR for a movie studio, and we were encouraged to go out to lunch with reporters from the trades. Marc worked for Daily Variety and he was my favorite reporter to eat with. Why? Because he was my age, he was gay, he was brilliant and cute and flirty and fun. We had much more fun telling stories about this person or that person than anything substantive about video business.

He was also a playwright; also an activist. He was one of the founders of the Entertainment AIDS Alliance, and was on the Board of APLA and worked with the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD). Most of all, he was that kind of a person who just lit up a room when he walked in.

So all these years since, I’ve kept the white scarf in my drawer, occasionally taking it out. Perhaps I’ll wear it someday. Perhaps I’ll tie somebody up with it one day. Perhaps I’ll just always keep it to remind myself of the gentle soul who made so many lives a little bit brighter.
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From the LA Times in 1993:

Marc Berman, 39, playwright, Variety columnist and AIDS activist. A native of Ohio who was educated at Boston University, Berman began his career as an actor in regional theater and went on to write such critically acclaimed plays as “The Wolf Patrol,” “River Downs” and “The Day Andy Warhol Got Shot.” He moved to Los Angeles in 1986 as West Coast bureau chief for TWICE magazine, an acronym for This Week in Consumer Electronics. In 1990, he joined Video Business and then became a staff writer for Daily Variety, doing reviews and covering home video and film and AIDS in the entertainment industry. For the past year, he also wrote a column for the weekly Variety. In 1989, Berman co-founded the fund-raising Video Industry AIDS Action Committee. He also served on the board of AIDS Project Los Angeles and was active in the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation. On Nov. 6 in Sherman Oaks of AIDS.

Blogger with “Hermes” scarf

Marc Berman

 

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Los Angeles Gay Pride #ResistMarch 2017

I need a new phone!

I was going to bring my camera to this event but I forgot it, what with the sign and all. So, my apologies, the phone ran out of juice about halfway through. I couldn’t even call a Lyft to go back to the subway once it was over. Yes, I know, #Firstworldproblems. I have failed today.

I did love that the Pride Celebration in LA returned to its protest roots. Energizing and energetic, it was great to see the 100,000 people come out to march in the streets in resistance to the “not normal in any way” times we find ourselves in, to reaffirm our equal rights as gay, lesbian, trans, bi, queer, unsure, whatever. We’ve fought very hard for a very long time and honey, we’re not giving an inch. Not. one. inch.

Enjoy the photos and the one video I did manage to take.

And a video snippet:

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Tax Day Protest: April 15, 2017

Never got a chance to post these to the blog, since I left on the month-long train trip just a week after this event. (hint – I have lots of photos and video of the trip, coming in subsequent posts).

What this was: Trying to keep Trump honest. A task in and of itself, to be sure. I’m not certain that’s even possible, but we Angelenos, and thousands of our compatriots around the country, the Resistance to this Pompous Ass, tried to remind him of his promises to release tax returns. So far, bupkis. Anyway, enjoy the photos and the one video. DTLA, April 15. See me in my red ITMFA hat (Impeach the Motherfucker Already)? Normally red’s not my color but I made an exception.

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A Few Things Following Male Models on Instagram Taught Me

OK, I’ll admit it: I’m a middle-aged gay man lusting over a number of sweet young Instagram things who have the unmitigated audacity to post endless photos of themselves naked, or nearly naked, or in the throes of their latest physical exploits or modeling sessions. And, dear reader, of course, I am hooked. This is so much better than making friends on Facebook. No, no need to ever pretend to be interested in someone’s political opinion just so they’ll keep you as a “friend” and “like” you; Instagram is pure sexy voyeur heaven.

Some insights (besides the propensity to waste time ogling):

  • You can learn a new language: Italian, Russian, Brazilian Portuguese, and more
  • Models can be just as boring as anyone. Repeated blurry and dark videos of club nights. Boring. Repeated videos or photos of smoothies. Also boring. Repeated images of high protein meals. Super boring!
  • Endless views of your workout routine also do get boring. Exceptions: bicep workouts. Butt workouts.
  • Silent Movie Syndrome: yes, model, your voice can sink you. When in doubt, use the silent approach or do the music-over option. Don’t be responsible for bursting my lust bubble, you manly-man you!
  • They like to show off their dogs and cats as much as anyone on the Internet. Many of these beauties seem to live alone yet they have a pet or pets with personality plus.
  • Who are the unsung heroes or heroines taking the pictures? Many are selfies, sure; but many are not. Are these behind-the-scenes folks partners or roommates or paid assistants? Interns? I think that’s an interesting story in itself.
  • Gorgeous boys can be lonely too. I see it in the faces of their “lights out” photos, I see it in the empty gyms they haunt at all hours of the night (and early morning), sometimes I see it blatantly when they complain about having no one. So I guess there’s a message there for all of us.
  • Mostly what I love is the infectious optimism of youth. I think that comes through loud and clear for all these guys (maybe not with every post!) and I find it quite inspiring. KEEP POSTING PLEASE!

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Looking for guys to watch? Here’s a current list of my favorite males to follow on Insta (not in any order!):

ranajo – a Brazilian model-type guy from Bahia. In addition to the usual swimwear mega-eye candy, he also shoots lots of little videos of him and his friends dancing and singing. It has a wonderful youthful Brazilian spirit to it all and you can compile a Brazilian holiday calendar, too.

 

 

 

 

 

Lap_NYC

Lap_NYC – He is probably my favorite. He’s a dancer/model, possibly from Israel (?) originally, working on Instagram to model underwear. Lucky us. Also surprisingly gentle and moody and kind of wistful, which I like. Secret: I found youtube videos of him on what appears to be the Israeli version of “Dancing with the Stars.” It’s great, find it.

 

 

 

 

 

BroganNYC

broganNYC – At first glance – well, sorry, BROgan, I don’t want to be stereotypical, but — he looks like a typical Chelsea or WeHo trophy boy. Except that – he’s nice and he’s really silly! And he has a cute boyfriend he poses with while they eat ice cream in bed! This is the guy you’d think would never talk to you, but his videos indicate anything but that kind of attitude. That’s what I love about it, he turns this exclusionary stereotype on its ear. Bravo, Brogan!

 

 

 

 

CaseyFieldNYC

caseyfieldNYC — Casey appears to be the most down-to-earth and professional of the models listed here. He has a superb sense of humor and gives fun little workout and diet tips in his NY accent as he walks around the big city. Always cheers me up.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Corkswag

corkswag — I think Corkswag is a dancer/actor here in L.A. He may also be a go-go boy. In fact, I think he is a go-go-boy. He’s also a major tease but he’s so cute who can hardly blame him? Not me, certainly. And those teeth! Those nipples!

 

 

 

 

 

 

faalbe

faalbe — see above, I’m learning Italian. Is he a dancer? Not sure. Lots of annotated pictures of male pulchritude with Italian words so see, I am learning. Italian men in their underwear teaching across the waters. So grateful.

 

 

 

 

 

 

coelhorodrigo

coelhorodrigo – the awesomely enterprising beauty of Rio de Janeiro! He is insanely gorgeous, I think he’s a model/stylist and also a jewelry designer. He travels around Brazil a lot for his work and shoots it so you get to see a lot of that beautiful country on Rodrigo’s posts. There’s also more perfect teeth.

 

 

 

 

 

watchjoego

watchjoego — His bio says San Diego but I think he’s usually posting from L.A. He’s one of those who goes to the gym at 4 in the morning. If that’s what it takes to look like he does, I’d do that too, well, if I was 25. Thank god I’m old because I have no desire to be that anymore. But I love looking at Joe! He’s also very upbeat – reminding me of one reason to love young men, because they are OPTIMISTIC. I like that.

 

 

 

 

oddlyshouseofenough

oddlyshouseofenough (gets the prize for best moniker). I don’t know if I could ever see enough of this man. I think this one is local too (SoCal) but the first photo I saw of him was where he appeared to be on a stripper pole that someone had in their kitchen. His own, perhaps? There are also some photos of this guy in leather that are stunning.

 

 

 

 

 

jakejacob01

jakejacob01 is a more recent find. Just a really hot guy who posts great pictures of his awesome self, sometimes with his boyfriend, sometimes not. I think he lives in Texas.

 

 

 

 

 

 

kevincarnell

kevincarnell is another beauty. I honestly don’t know how bodies like this happen, though I suspect they take an insane amount of dedication, good nutrition, and good genes to help that process. I certainly love seeing the results. Do not miss this one!

 

 

 

 

 

 

johnmacconnell

johnmacconnell is an artist, who paints a lot of male nudes, couples, usually looks like they’re watercolors. He sells them, I know that much. He’s also a runner, posts his times and photos of himself in gear. He’s very hot himself. A young man making it in NYC.

 

 

 

 

 

 

e.santiago23

e.santiago23  – kind of your typical super-hot louche medical student from south of the border. Again, check out the nipples! Wide variety of posts from beach to club parties to classroom; I believe he lives in Mexico but is from Puerto Rico, so I also like seeing the backgrounds and his coterie of attractive friends. Also singing – love that about these guys. Doctor, doctor, can you examine me, please?

 

 

 

 

derek_stone87

derek_stone87 — kind of under the radar, don’t know how he showed up on my Instagram but he’s just a very attractive young guy, who has a husband, who might live in Colorado. Takes lots of pictures with pets (dogs esp.) and might be in that (veterinary) profession.

 

 

 

 

 

Who are your favorites? I can certainly add more to my feed. Let me know!

 

 

 

 

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On FADA, Notes on the License to Discriminate

It’s possible that the right wing, now that they control all three layers of the federal government, will try and pass a version of the FADA (The First Amendment Defense Act) so I thought I’d write a bit about it, why it’s unnecessary and basically just a convenient license for using the federal government to discriminate against people you don’t like.

 

The Right Wing doesn’t like a lot of people, though the FADA is usually understood as a backlash targeting LGBT people as a result of marriage equality and other social gains by LGBT in recent years.

Here’s the text of the Amendment:

Notwithstanding any other provision of law, the Federal Government shall not take any discriminatory action against a person, wholly or partially on the basis that such person believes or acts in accordance with a religious belief or moral conviction that marriage is or should be recognized as the union of one man and one woman, or that sexual relations are properly reserved to such a marriage. [H.R. 2802, introduced 6/17/15]

The Right Wing asserts that this amendment is needed to protect the religious views of people who feel this way, i.e., their first amendment rights. In reality, it would enshrine the right to discriminate against LGBT persons, unmarried single mothers, or any couple of any sexual combination residing together unmarried. Among the things it would allow are these examples:

  • allow federal contractors or grantees, including those that provide important social services like homeless shelters or drug treatment programs, to turn away LGBT people or anyone who has an intimate relationship outside of a marriage
  • let commercial landlords violate longstanding fair housing laws by refusing housing to a single mother based on the religious belief that sexual relations are properly reserved for marriage
  • permit a university to continue to receive federal financial assistance even when it fires an unmarried teacher simply for becoming pregnant
  • permit government employees to discriminate against married same-sex couples and their families – federal employees could refuse to process tax returns, visa applications, or Social Security checks for all married same-sex couples
  • allow businesses to discriminate by refusing to let gay or lesbian employees care for their sick spouse, in violation of family medical leave laws [ACLU, 7/20/15]

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So basically, such a law would throw out existing protections LGBT have through the government and allow discrimination based on someone’s beliefs.

I would be awestruck to see where it is in the defining documents of these religions (i.e., The Bible) where it says that you’re supposed to not bake that gay wedding cake or not cut that social security check for that gay man. Cause it doesn’t say that anywhere. Basically, if you believe those documents, they tell you that YOU – the person having that belief – are not supposed to live your life that way. In other words, if you believe those scriptures, YOU should not live a gay life. It doesn’t say anything about the rest of us, which, incidentally, is not even relevant because the United States is not guided or beholden to ancient religious texts.

Also, the Right Wing seems to think that it needs this law to protect its anti-LGBT churches and schools from the big bad IRS. But that argument is easily debunked, e.g. churches of all kinds (Catholics, are you listening?) have been discriminating against women for eons without getting their tax exempt status revoked. And of course, you can always still believe what you want and teach whatever doctrine you have in your religious school. We don’t have the thought police, at least not yet (Minority Report?)

So if these two items are eliminated, what is left? Oh, I guess maybe you can’t just use  your religion as a hammer to punish people you don’t like. Sorry.

It’s like this (paraphrased from a letter to the editor on media matters.com, from “nerzog”):

Religious beliefs are protected. Religiously inspired actions are not. So: They’re still allowed to be bigots, they can think what they want. They can still verbally express their bigotry, if they’re willing to endure the social consequences. What they can’t do is: break anti-discrimination laws.

Most of the data in this post comes from media matters.

 

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