Author Archives: JimArnoldLA

On heterosexual privilege: A List

Daily Kos: On heterosexual privilege.

I thought this was interesting. We don’t normally think of the world as being set up as a heterosexist enterprise, although that is the default position of the majority. So, the items in this list might not be apparent to most if they’re not pointed out. Helpfully, both the diary linked above and Davey Wavey’s site (a young man, allergic to shirts, not a bad thing, in his case) listed these.

I don’t know who to credit for the list, but thank you:

The Heterosexual Privilege Checklist
On a daily basis, a heterosexual person:

  1. I can be pretty sure that my roomate, hallmates and classmates will be comfortable with my sexual orientation.
  2. If I pick up a magazine, watch TV, or play music, I can be certain my sexual orientation will be represented.
  3. When I talk about my heterosexuality (such as in a joke or talking about my relationships), I will not be accused of pushing my sexual orientation onto others.
  4. I do not have to fear that if my family or friends find out about my sexual orientation there will be economic, emotional, physical or psychological consequences.
  5. I did not grow up with games that attack my sexual orientation (IE f*g tag or smear the queer).
  6. I am not accused of being abused, warped or psychologically confused because of my sexual orientation.
  7. I can go home from most meetings, classes, and conversations without feeling excluded, fearful, attacked, isolated, outnumbered, unheard, held at a distance, stereotyped or feared because of my sexual orientation.
  8. I am never asked to speak for everyone who is heterosexual.
  9. I can be sure that my classes will require curricular materials that testify to the existence of people with my sexual orientation. [And that no one will accuse educators, school board members, or government officials of attempting to “promote” that sexual orientation by including those materials. –musing85]
  10. People don’t ask why [or when] I made my choice of sexual orientation.
  11. People don’t ask why I made my choice to be public about my sexual orientation.
  12. I do not have to fear revealing my sexual orientation to friends or family. It’s assumed.
  13. My sexual orientation was never associated with a closet.
  14. People of my gender do not try to convince me to change my sexual orientation.
  15. I don’t have to defend my heterosexuality.
  16. I can easily find a religious community that will not exclude me for being heterosexual.
  17. I can count on finding a therapist or doctor willing and able to talk about my sexuality.
  18. I am guaranteed to find sex education literature for couples with my sexual orientation.
  19. Because of my sexual orientation, I do not need to worry that people will harass me.
  20. I have no need to qualify my heterosexual identity.
  21. My masculinity/femininity is not challenged because of my sexual orientation.
  22. I am not identified by my sexual orientation.
  23. I can be sure that if I need legal or medical help my sexual orientation will not work against me.
  24. If my day, week, or year is going badly, I need not ask of each negative episode or situation whether it has sexual orientation overtones.
  25. Whether I rent or I go to a theater, Blockbuster, an EFS or TOFS movie, I can be sure I will not have trouble finding my sexual orientation represented.
  26. I am guaranteed to find people of my sexual orientation represented in my workplace.
  27. I can walk in public with my significant other and not have people double-take or stare.
  28. I can choose to not think politically about my sexual orientation.
  29. I do not have to worry about telling my roommate about my sexuality. It is assumed I am a heterosexual.
  30. I can remain oblivious of the language and culture of LGBTQ folk without feeling in my culture any penalty for such oblivion.
  31. I can go for months without being called straight.
  32. I’m not grouped because of my sexual orientation.
  33. My individual behavior does not reflect on people who identity as heterosexual.
  34. In everyday conversation, the language my friends and I use generally assumes my sexual orientation. For example, sex inappropriately referring to only heterosexual sex or family meaning heterosexual relationships with kids.
  35. People do not assume I am experienced in sex (or that I even have it!) merely because of my sexual orientation.
  36. I can kiss a person of the opposite gender on the heart or in the cafeteria without being watched and stared at.
  37. Nobody calls me straight with maliciousness.
  38. People can use terms that describe my sexual orientation and mean positive things (IE “straight as an arrow”, “standing up straight” or “straightened out” ) instead of demeaning terms (IE “ewww, that’s gay” or being “queer” ) .
  39. I am not asked to think about why I am straight.
  40. I can be open about my sexual orientation without worrying about my job.

Now I don’t really know anyone, gay or straight, whose life is a bed of roses. So I know it’s not easy out there, but still…

Congratulations again to all the New Yorkers who are going to be married soon!

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Canada’s Leader of the ‘Tea Party North’

Canada’s Leader of the ‘Tea Party North’

I always thought, if it ever gets bad enough here, and the Right takes over everything and totally destroys the country (and they appear to be well on the way!) – I could always go north to Canada.

Well, that fantasy has been shattered. Meet Rob Ford, honorary head of Tea Partay North! Here he is in this linked article, trying to privatize garbage collection in Toronto.

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It’s hard to like some fool who is anti-bike. Looks like chubby Rob could get some of those bike benefits himself, like a reduced weight, lower blood pressure, etc. But he doesn’t care, obviously.

Is this the new political adoration, a la this Chris Christie model? Looks like he’s had more of a french fry party than a tea party, hey? I know, cheap shot, but don’t you know, at the “end of the day, it’s his own fault.”

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Purple is as purple does

As I was contemplating moving back into Los Angeles, for some reason I thought of this lady, who I used to see all the time walking around, a vision in purple hues.

A few clicks later I found that someone (thanks, Gregg Archambault!) had made a little movie about Edna, the lady who wears purple. I believe, or at least it looks like, this was shot at the corner of my old place there (at Clayton and Rosalia Road).

Anyway, enjoy the stylings of Edna, and my hat’s off to you, for this unique fashion treat. I don’t like eggplant either.

“It looks like spring.”

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Inland Empire seniors have nation’s second-worst access to public transit… and don’t try and cross a street, either, sucka

Inland Empire seniors have nation’s second-worst access to public transit, study says –

Inland Empire, from Julia Takes Pictures

Not that I was surprised to hear this, yet it is sad.

Makes you wonder what they were thinking when they planned the interurban sprawl of freeways and suburbs back in the 50s and 60s. That cars, no matter how many, would always be the solution. That internal combustion engines, no matter how polluting, would never exceed the capacity for the environment to clean itself from their toxins.

I suppose it must have seemed like nirvana at the time, all this cheap land away from from noise and problems of the city. Of course, now that nirvana is a nightmare.

As long as I’ve had a place in Palm Springs, we have been promised daily train service between the desert and Los Angeles. It’s been 10 years now, and so far it hasn’t happened. I, for one, am not holding my breath. Even though I’m moving back to the city from the desert, I still hope we see that one day as an option – not just for seniors, but for everyone.

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“Benediction” interview

Jim’s SellingBooks “Benediction” interview

Benediction

Here’s an interview I did recently for SellingBooks.com. I talk about some of the motivations behind the novel “Benediction” and part of my writing process – and it’s good for me to read this, as with all the drama and busyness around moving, I have to admit I’ve strayed from my regular writing commitments in the morning.

I have to go to Hollywood Park or Santa Anita when back in L.A., to do some research on the ponies, so that will be fun.
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Looking forward to that, and having a life free of boxes. Honestly, I hope I don’t have to move for a long time after this one.

Have a great week everyone! Although it may seem counter intuitive, since it’s so hot so many places already, it is the last week of spring, so enjoy it!

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Technology Provides an Alternative to Love…

Photo, Sebastian Anthony

Link to Jonathan Franzen – Technology Provides an Alternative to Love.

Well, it’s less messy. Or just delays the inevitable?

I enjoyed Jonathan Franzen’s insight into the phenomenon of “Liking,” particularly as it applies to Facebook.

Even as we (and me included) wholeheartedly enjoy social networking and enthusiastically “like” our friends’ photos, tastes in music, articles, etcetera, at some deeper level we truly do understand this is no substitute for real friendship.

In all honesty, my Facebook “friends” now include probably more people that I’ve never met than those who I actually have. And of those – I’m like most people, in that I only consider a few true “friends.”

But, social media and networking IS useful. I’ve found out more of what’s going on, as in events happening. I’ve been invited to more parties! I’ve gotten a lot of fashion tips, always helpful. Lately, I’ve received tips on finding apartments – and in general, when I pose a question to a Facebook “group,” I receive worthwhile information back.
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I’ve unfriended (defriended?) a few people, mostly (I will admit it) because their politics didn’t agree with mine. I figured there was so much right wing bullshit being thrown at me everyday from multiple sources in real life, I sure as hell didn’t need it from Facebook “friends.” So indeed, “my” social media will reflect the mirror.

I want to read Franzen’s “Freedom,” but haven’t yet. Anyone have an opinion? I hear it’s wonderful.

 

 

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Jaunt to Cabot’s Museum in Desert Hot Springs

Over the weekend, I went with friend Roger F. and the local California Men’s Gathering group to Cabot’s Pueblo Museum at the edge of Desert Hot Springs.

Cabot Yerxa was an adventurer, a pioneer, a homesteader and an obvious non-conformist. (He was also a member of the extended blueblood Cabot Lodge family.)

He built this house of found and local materials – everything from stone and adobe to railroad ties, driftwood, ruins from other homes, broken glass. It’s intricate and fascinating. They say he was not a fan of symmetry, but I found his intricate dwelling to be symmetric in its own peculiar way.

Cabot was also the person who, when looking for water to just survive the desert, came across the hot springs. Actually, he found both the cold water he needed to drink and the hot water from the springs in this same hill, which is where he built this replica of an Indian Pueblo, which does look like a version of the Taos Pueblo – though much smaller.

Here’s some exterior pictures for you to enjoy. They didn’t let us photograph inside, but it’s well worth the visit should you go. My favorite part of the interior was the upper level apartment he built for his wife, Portia, which included all the comforts of what a lady from the city would need out in the desert – which, at that time, was still in the middle of nowhere. Less that today.

CMG guy standing in front of the pueblo structure

Ancient Weather Rock predicts the weather

Enormous Saguaros in the garden

 

Cabot's Pueblo

Ironwood Tree shades the courtyard

View across the valley to Palm Springs and Mt. San Jacinto

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Sorry, blog was down.

Foolishly I changed servers without thinking it would be an issue of any kind. Well, I was wrong. I think most of the blog survived but I have to reload a bunch of pix.

I will get to it! As always, thank you for your interest.
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BTW, yes that is a new picture on the blog homepage. It’s my own, yes I did climb to the top of that damn mountain (Mt. San Jacinto, above Palm Springs)!

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TV dramas losing favor with busy television viewers

Television: TV dramas are losing favor with busy television viewers

Ah, the dilemma of the multitasking viewer.

Interesting story (by Joe Flint) above in the Los Angeles Times about how difficult it is to keep viewers interested in any but the most simplistic plotlines. One executive says “most viewers are watching television with a laptop on their legs,” which is an obvious exaggeration, but according to other research cited, about 20% of the audience is using a computer, an Ipad or a smartphone while trying to keep up with a network drama plot.

The result isn’t good for anyone involved with drama from the creatives involved to the execs to the companies buying ads that no one is watching. From where I sit, this means fewer jobs than ever for writers in Hollywood. Also from where I sit as a fan and TV viewer, it means more inane reality series. Please, please, don’t foist more real housewives upon us, I think we get it!

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In public, where I used to occupy my hands with something like smoking (quit 20 years ago) now to combat nervousness or boredom I do the same thing, play with Iphone.Tap, tap, tap, slide.

I can’t tell you how long it takes me to get through a 43 minute episode of a standard TV drama on Hulu or Netflix. Because I constantly pause, check other things, get up and go to the kitchen, the bathroom, the mailbox, the whatever. I will say I always return, and rarely if ever do I bail on an episode once I’ve started. If you’d told me years ago I’d develop this kind of technology-inspired adult ADD I’d have said you were nuts.

But here I am. So, ‘fess up, who else multitasks while watching TV?

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Selling a Condo in Palm Springs

Link to the MLS listing for my condo

my living room

UPDATE: Condo is in escrow, after just 12 days on the market! Keeping my fingers crossed! Oh, and looking for an apartment in L.A.

Departing from the usual rant and roll of this or that, today I’m focused on commerce, specifically my own real estate listing.

That’s right, my Palm Springs condo is on the market (MLS Listing #41428157). I’ll be moving back to Los Angeles, for many reasons.

If you’re interested, please click on the link above for all the pictures and the description.

What I would like to do here is give my own reasons why this is such a great place to live – assuming you’re looking for a place in Palm Springs.

  • The condo itself:
    • has an extra room that can be either a bedroom (with a full closet), a guest room, or an office, which is what I usually use it for.
      • additionally, I made an extra closet in the main bedroom into a little home office set-up, perfect for the weekend desert rat or to be used if the other room is being used as a bedroom or guest room.

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    • It has a washer/dryer in the unit, which I had plumbed and wired just a year ago for this purpose. Believe me, it’s so much nicer than having to go to the complex laundry across the road.
    • All the units here have private yards – in my case, I went the extra step and put in a final wall and garden gate so that it’s totally enclosed and private, perfect for a pet, parties, nude sunbathing (hey, this is PS!) or what have you. If I would be here another winter, I’d be getting one of those nifty firepit dishes.
    • The condo is located in the center of the complex – which means it’s steps away from the parking area, the carports, the dumpster (well, who wants to cart the garbage all over the place?) and best of all, the pool/spa/clubhouse. I often go over for night swims and it’s like my private pool, since no one is around. Heaven!
  • The Palm Springs neighborhood (Warm Sands)
    • the benefits of the complex’s location are many, here are a few that are important to me:
      • it’s on the south end of town, meaning OUT OF THE WIND, for the most part.
      • No airport noise.
      • Adjacent to Warm Sands Resort Area, which you know about already if you’re gay. If you’re not, it’s the extremely well-kept area of a lot of gay resorts
      • Walkable to downtown. Or bikeable. Also walkable to a big shopping area which has a Ralphs, a Starbucks, a Subway, a CVS, a Carl’s Jr., a Jamba Juice, a Domino’s, and more. Across the street from there is another shopping area with a bakery, a natural foods store, and many more businesses.
      • Across yet another road from this shopping area (and also walkable from the condo) is Sunrise Park, where the city library is located, as well as the stadium, a skate park, and the big municipal pool, for those who like doing laps. About a block or so beyond that is the Camelot Theater, which is an art house in the desert. Next to it is where they locate the Saturday Farmers’ Market.
  • For those recreationally-minded:
    • I’m not much of a golfer or a tennis guy, but please know both those sports abound out here in the desert and from what I understand it’s pretty much a paradise for both.
    • Palm Springs is a bike and hike paradise – the city keeps many bike routes marked, and on a number of streets the sidewalk doubles as a bike path. And, except for a few areas (like Cathedral City Cove) it’s as flat as a pancake, which is good for biking.
    • For hiking, Palm Springs is blessed with a number of wilderness areas in easy reach. In addition to Mount San Jacinto, which you can hike up or tram up (to amazing trails at 10,000 feet) there is the Whitewater Preserve, the Morongo Preserve, Joshua Tree National Park, the Mecca Hills, etc. truly an amazing variety of trails for the beginner to the expert.
  • PS is now a year-round destination. It used to be that businesses closed in the summer but now Palm Springs and the other desert cities have such large permanent resident populations this is no longer the case. Pool resorts and restaurants just turn on the misters! If it gets too hot, a quick trip up the tram lowers the temperature by 30-40 degrees and you’re in a beautiful alpine forest. Idyllwild is a short drive away, and if you’re set on going to the beach, you can get to Laguna in two hours or less.

So, there’s some of what’s been important to me the last 10 years I’ve had this place. I’m sure I’ll think of more and keep updating this post.

 

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