Tag Archives: gay marriage

And Now, the Astonishing Actual History Of The Gay Rights Movement, or Look Ma, I’m Equal

photo: AARP

Look Ma, I’m equal today! Today, I have the same marriage rights as my 7 straight siblings. For my first 60 years, I have been denied those rights. This is a marvelous day, which will only increase in profundity as time wears on.

I certainly don’t always agree with the writer Andrew Sullivan but I did like his great perspective on our shared gay history, and this seems like an appropriate occasion to link to it and bring it back out.

It is interesting, what he says in the piece about the average 22 year old gay male today just assuming that his right to get married to another man is a given.

Case in point: Facebook! On Facebook, whatever we might think of it, it allows the generations to mix in a way that was previously largely impossible. I have an acquaintance, a musician/writer type, who is of that age group, 20s, Millennials, whatever you want to call them. I call it young and cute, in his case.

Anyway, this guy got engaged (!!) to another young man, equally as adorable, about his age. Since that announcement, I’ve been following their various travels and insanely cute and wonderful pictures as they go about planning their wedding and reception and all that.

To a gay man of my age and generation, (OK, I was 60 earlier in 2015) this is quite astonishing. I never thought we’d see same sex marriage in my lifetime; this wasn’t even something I thought about much at all. But I’m really happy that others did think of it, and thought big. Look where we are, look where we’ve come. There is so much more to do; just because there’s now a judicial decision making marriage equality the law of all 50 states doesn’t mean that people will change how they feel inside. The work goes on. And on. Like it always has.

And — even better, I got an engagement announcement from a gay couple who are friends of mine yesterday. Yes, this was via Facebook. They’re not quite Millennials; they’re older, but still I have to say I loved seeing the relative pomp and circumstance of a social media announcement like this. How wonderful it is for them to be able to share their love with the world this way.

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Why Are Faggots So Afraid of Faggots? Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore Weighs in on Marriage Equality, the Occupy Movement, and Freedom

SF Weekly photo of Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore by Kevin Coleman

I was quite interested in Chris Hall’s SF Weekly piece from several months ago on gay writer/editor/activist/Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore, so I clipped it.

Mattilda has a refreshing point of view, to say the least. I mean, have you wondered, as I have wondered from time to time, just why the gay movement wants inclusion into a couple of the more broken institutions of our time (marriage and the military)?

As she says in the article, and I paraphrase, maybe we should be working to get rid of the constriction of marriage, maybe we should be working to abolish the American military, hell-bent as it seems to be on endless, bankrupting wars of aggression.

I would argue (and agree with Mattilda) that the confines of the monogamous, traditional marriage are anything but queer as we know it. It seems to often be a dreadful institution, well in need of some redefinition, and by that I don’t mean defining it to include gay couples but defining a marriage relationship by itself to be very broad.

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I was at a discussion group not too long ago where one of our senior radicals was present (a member of the original radical faerie group) and when the topic of gay marriage came up, he really couldn’t stop laughing, he found the whole thing so absurd. This is not to rain on the parade of anyone who wants to get married — I think everyone should who wants to — but the gay movement was all about redefining our lives in such a way as to be much bigger than that which had come before – by doing such things as realizing the unique purpose and viewpoints of gay people. They would say we are here for a reason on this planet. They would say we are not just like everyone else (take away all the sex, there are still huge differences between gay and straight). This is the anti-assimilation point of view.

I applaud Mattilda for being able to articulate that contrarian point of view, not easy these days when everyone wants you to just jump on the safe, “well-behaved faggot” bandwagon. She also has a few choice words for the “It Gets Better” phenomenon – truly, how does telling a kid that things will get better in 4 or 5 years help him or her TODAY when life is a living hell? I’m not sure I have an answer for that. Maybe that the campaign is a step on the way for safety for these bullied kids? I think that’s likely.

What do you think about the gay movement? Do you think assimilation is the key, or do you think celebrating the difference is the way to go? Or, should it something entirely different?

About those Republican Candidates and “bordering on disgust”

What, indeed, is wrong with these people?

Since it’s the day before the Wisconsin/Maryland Primary, it’s as good a time as any to re-shine a light on what the Republican candidates may have said about gays and gay rights issues, including marriage equality, over the course of their campaigns.

Fred Karger Calls for Romney, Santorum, Gingrich to Disavow NOM Pledge.

Above is a link to Karen Ocamb’s LGBT/POV blog post on gay Republican candidate Fred Karger’s demand that the other candidates he’s running against – Mitt Romney, Rick Santorum, Newt Gingrich – repudiate the pledges they made to the National Organization for Marriage (NOM) earlier in the campaign, basically promising to uphold traditional marriage by way of constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage, to defend DOMA, to follow the “original intent of the Constitution” even to officially investigate the “harassment of traditional marriage supporters” – whatever that means.

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It’s come out that NOM, the organization that viciously fights marriage equality, is being investigated for money laundering in Maine, so he’s using these possible illegal activities as the basis the candidates should repudiate their pledges – along with the fact that the pledges are just genuinely hateful. Continue reading →

Why CAN'T We Do This Here?

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9BDOOvu5luk]

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