Category Archives: Wanderslut 1996

Bisbee, The Gayest Small Town in Arizona

The first time I happened upon “Gay Bisbee” was really by accident. I was a tourist visiting Tombstone on a road trip. Bisbee is just down the highway a bit, really the last little city on the road that leads to the Mexican border.

Photo of downtown Bisbee, Arizona, by Jim Arnold used to illustrate his blog post on Bisbee - the gayest small town in AZ.
Shot of Bisbee, Arizona – taken in the ’90s on one of the blogger’s road trips.

I knew nothing about it but it had a weird and quirky name, so I had to see it. It’s small old mining town set in a valley, with houses dotting the hills above the main drag, which features a lot of turn-of-the-century era (the 20th century) brick buildings. The population is around 5,000.

Bisbee in the Past

Bisbee’s original claim to fame was mining. The Copper Queen mine (now closed, except for tours) was one of the biggest mining operations in Arizona for the period of the 1880s till WWII. The town of Bisbee grew up around it, hence the preponderance of architecture from that era, not only public buildings, but houses as well.

The population has been twice what it is now when the mines were active. So what happens when there’s an infrastructure for a larger town, but the people have left? Well, that brings us to:

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Bisbee Today

It always starts with those artists, now doesn’t it? Kidding, but no. Really. Artists almost always need inexpensive living and studio space, and what better location could there be than an old mining town that has lots of vacancy and low prices? That’s a bit of what happened in the 1970s to Bisbee, and the galleries followed that, the coffeeshops and B&Bs followed that, then it was attractive to Boomers retiring . . . and you can guess the rest.

Photo of downtown Bisbee, Arizona, by Jim Arnold used to illustrate his blog post on Bisbee - the gayest small town in AZ.
Shot of Bisbee, Arizona – taken in the ’90s on one of the blogger’s road trips. Lots of houses and other buildings are perched on the hillsides surrounding the old town.

“Gay Bisbee” got its rep as a gay-friendly place by passing Arizona’s first same-sex civil union ordinance, back in the days before marriage equality. The town was already quite diverse and progressive – and continues that way. A bit of bright blue in a bright red state (which is increasingly becoming “purpler” and will no doubt become reliably blue in the future).

Bisbee in the Future

Boomer and other retirees? I imagine that trend will continue. With the popularity of AirBnb, the area will only get more popular as a tourist and getaway destination, a fairly easy drive from both Phoenix and Tucson and even El Paso. For myself, I look forward to spending more time there in those quiet, peaceful desert hills.

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Five Things I Love About Las Vegas

In a prior life (like, when I was still working for corporate America) I traveled to Las Vegas quite often for conventions and conferences, as it is probably the premier location in the United States for such things. There were many things I did not like about those trips, but here’s a few things that I did like:

Lots of Parking, Lots of it Free

I don’t know if it’s still true, but it certainly used to be that the majority of visitors to Vegas came from Southern California, and most of them by car. And why not? The city fathers and mothers, whether they were the mafia or relocated Mormon politicians, made Vegas an attractive, cheap, and close getaway.

Much to the delight of residents of California, who daily struggle with not only finding parking but also most often paying, in some way, for it. Vegas was wide open spaces, empty streets and parking structures with plenty of vacancies and nary a pay booth or parking meter in sight.

That changed a bit in recent years, with most Strip hotel/casinos still offering gratis parking for customers with the exception of (as of this writing in Dec. 2020) the Caesars Entertainment Group properties which charges fees if you’re not a guest or a Nevadan (Bally’s, Caesars Palace, Flamingo, Harrah’s, Linq, Paris Las Vegas).

The Monorail

Thing is, I like crowded cities that have mass transit systems – of some sort. Also hate inefficiencies when I see them. Like, for instance, long cab lines at the enormous Vegas venues.

Photo of Las Vegas Monorail to illustrate Jim Arnold's blog entry "Five Things I Love About Las Vegas."
The Las Vegas Monorail.

Good for the cab and ride share industries, maybe, not so good for you. Plus, if you’re there on your own dime, these fares can really add up. Which is why the Monorail was such a great idea (note, as of this writing in Dec. 2020, it’s still closed due to Covid).

Located just to the east of the Strip casino hotels, the Monorail is a pleasant, quick and relatively cheap way to get around the main hotel-casino-convention area of Vegas. There were/are plans to extend the Monorail north to downtown and south to the airport. Like with so many projects like this, the funding for such a project isn’t clear.

Perhaps Mayor Pete Buttigieg can help when he’s Transportation Secretary?

Red Rock Canyon National Conservation Area

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If you get sick of the bustle, which can be overwhelming, there’s an antidote close by. Just to the east of Vegas and only a short drive from the Strip area (around 20 minutes) is the Red Rock Canyon National Conservation Area.

Photo from the Red Rock Canyon National Conservation Area, illustrating Jim Arnold's blog post "Five Things I Love About Las Vegas."
Red Rock Canyon National Preservation Area vista – on a clear day, you can see forever.

Hiking, picnics, views, bicycling — many options are available in this pristine and quiet desert getaway. Oh, and they have wild burros living there, too. You might get lucky and see one or two.

Casino Buffets

These used to be something like “$1.99 for all you can eat” back in the day. Those days are indeed long gone, but I still love the buffets, and they are still a great value.

What I love about them is: they have a wide variety of cuisines, and you can usually find something that you feel like eating. Of course, it’s as much as you want, so you can keep going back with your tray. Most buffets will have a chef making made-to-order items, just the way you like it.

I’ve never been rushed through a buffet and have never suffered a line that was more than, say, fifteen minutes long. They are staffed, but the waitpersons only do beverages and things like napkins, silverware. You can make it as healthy or as indulging as you’d like, and I really like that freedom. (Note: if you’re reading this during the pandemic, be advised that the buffets in Vegas are temporarily closed.)

There is Electricity in the Air!

Finally, there is always that feeling of expectation, that something wonderful can and will happen at any moment. Perhaps that something wonderful will come in the form of MONEY $$$$$$.

But it might be something else, like a triumph in your business (which might also result in $$$) or an unexpected hook up (like I got a few years back, as told in my book Wanderslut 1996: A Gay Road Trip Across America).

Or, it just might be the contact high you get in a place where so many people are on vacation and literally having the time of their lives. Suspend judgment for a moment, and the feeling might be infectious (and I don’t mean Covid-19)!

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Five Things I Learned While Traveling Solo

Whether you go by air, by car, by boat or by foot — traveling solo can be a learning experience. Here are five things I’ve learned on my various travels by myself:

I’m Not as Shy as I Thought

When I was a kid, I was quite hesitant to reach out to other kids and had a somewhat difficult time making friends, especially after a certain age (like, when adolescence kicked in). This is a real handicap to development. Remember, the Smiths’ hit song goes: “shyness is nice, but shyness can stop you from doing all the things in life you’d like to.”

Second grade photo of Blogger Jim Arnold, to illustrate when he was a shy boy. He's not shy anymore.
Wow, it’s the Blogger in second grade. (1962) Back when he was bashful!

That’s my take on it too. But when traveling solo, interacting with people you don’t know is an imperative, simply because there is no one else you know where you find yourself. I realized that, like so many things, it was a process of desensitization. The more you do it (talk to strangers) the easier it becomes. I’d even say that today I wouldn’t describe myself as shy, though I was described that way as a child.

The World is Way Friendlier Than You Think

Another thing I’ve learned traveling solo, especially in countries outside of my own (the U.S.) is that the people of the world are, in general, friendly. Americans are brought up with this crazy and inaccurate sense of exceptionalism, that anything and everything is always better in the U.S., which is, frankly, bullshit. I suppose this largely comes out of victory in WWII when we were the leaders of the “free” world for a while. That period is certainly over now.

Meeting citizens of other countries in their lands enriches a person and makes them more human, simply by absorbing the perspective of the other person, which is going to be different. This ranges from slightly different (say like Canada) to incredibly different (I’ll say India, where I haven’t been, but seems to be a good example). I think to become a citizen of the world is a worthy aspiration.

Overnight Trains/Red Eye Planes/Interstate Rest Stops are real Money Savers

Are you a frugal type? I usually try to be, though doing that effectively does require planning and research. Sometimes I’m too lazy to do that, but this hack never fails to save a few bucks.

Photo of Jim Arnold in an Amtrak roomette, this one on the Sunset Limited from LA to New Orleans in 2019. The seats fold down to make a bed.
The Blogger in an Amtrak roomette. The seats fold down to make a bed, and there is an upper berth as well.
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I first discovered that you could save money on youth hostel fees by taking overnight trains while traveling solo in Europe, when I went backpacking for a bit after high school. Most trains had seats that you could pull out to lie flat, and I remember using my parka (I was there in winter) rolled up as a pillow. Granted, it’s easier to accept a little discomfort at 18 that would be less tolerable at 65.

I still take red eye flights (especially to the east coast, where it makes sense with the time change) when I don’t need to be extremely alert upon arrival – so basically for any kind of travel other that business. And, when driving, I nap in my car at rest stops in lieu of paying for a motel room – or when I didn’t plan and no room was available. Not as comfy as a bed, for sure, but it does work — so I always include my pillow and a blanket when I pack for a road trip.

Despite the Stereotypes, Texas is Actually a Really Fun Place

To visit, anyway. Not sure I’d want to live there but — for a liberal gay guy from the west coast, makes sense to be wary about Texas, which at least has a reputation of being a bastion of gun-toting reactionaries who never left the 19th century. Media – especially movies and television — has done little to dispel this false stereotype. I say false because in reality, it’s not my lived experience.

Photo of blogger Jim Arnold at the Alamo in San Antonio. Photo illustrates a stop on Arnold's road trip chronicled in Wanderslut 1996: A Gay Road Trip Across America.
The blogger at the Alamo in San Antonio in 1996.

I’ve been surprised on just about every trip I’ve made to Texas – no matter if it was a road trip, like in my recent mostly-true memoir Wanderslut 1996: A Gay Road Trip Across America, or a more mundane business trip or film festival trip. I’ve found Texas to be fun, urbane, cultured, inquisitive, and happening. Perhaps there are rural pockets of the state that are more like the stereotype, but I’ve yet to come across them – and hope I don’t!

Fiber Comes in Capsules! Take a Bottle with You.

How unpleasant, to bring up bathroom habits while traveling. But yes, I’ll go there.

Without fail, I get constipated when traveling. Probably more as I got older, but still, it’s frightfully unpleasant and inconvenient. I suppose it’s a combination of routines being interrupted as well as diet alterations, coming together to deal a death blow to regularity.

I tried for years to just tweak the diet so I was eating like usual, but that ultimately didn’t work so well, because it was hard to control. Then I discovered Metamucil for everyday use at home, and then – I discovered that fiber came in capsules in a little bottle! Who knew? Certainly not me. But how perfect are these little fiber pills for trips? Honestly, since I discovered this secret-in-plain-sight, I haven’t been constipated while away from home. Highly recommended!

Cover of Jim Arnold's mostly true memoir Wanderslut 1996: A Gay Road Trip Across America, Kindle edition.
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Five Cons to Taking a Road Trip

In a previous post I listed Five Reasons to Take a Road Trip, but where there’s pluses, inevitably you find a few minuses. Here’s Five Cons to Taking a Road Trip.

Oh, My Aching Back and Legs!

We’ve all been bombarded with information during the pandemic emphasizing that sitting on your ass all day in front of a computer is bad for you. We knew that; we’ve heard that for years. Basically sitting in the driver’s seat is the exact same position and is equally as bad if not more so, as at least at home you have the option of standing up and stretching every few minutes if you want.

Photo for Jim Arnold's blog of the Five Cons of Taking a Road Trip, showing a man with a face mask and an eye patch.
Actually, it’s a pandemic and cataract surgery that accounts for this distressed passenger photo of the blogger. But you get the drift.

Doing that in a car would be impossible, or if not strictly impossible, highly inconvenient. As I’ve aged, I increasingly suffer from stiffness, as well as other aches and pains. I have what was diagonosed as lumbar radiculopathy, a fancy phrase for sciatica, which affects me more in the front of my leg than in back.

My solution on long road trips is to set a timer and actually pull off the road and walk around/stretch every hour at least. Seems to help a lot even if it makes the trip longer. That, and Ibuprofen.

I Have All The Time in the World – Or Not

Talking about the United States here — the country (continental 48 states) is huge and it takes a really long time to get places in a motor vehicle (especially west of the Mississippi). Your level of patience is something to gauge before you head out on a big road trip. You might very well get bored or anxious. In our world, we expect, more and more, instant gratification.

Additionally, it’s tough to plan a lengthy road trip with great accuracy. The longer you’re on the road, the more likely it is you’ll encounter bad weather or a mechanical problem, which leads me to:

A Car is a Machine with Parts that Break and Wear Out

It took me a long time to not feel that car failures were personal in nature. That my car wouldn’t get really mad at me (like, for not washing it enough) and fail; that it was, merely, a collection of inanimate parts that worked together to achieve movement and at times, parts in that sequence would collapse.

They’d get old and die, they’d just wear out, they’d crack under extreme heat or cold or axle-busting potholes. Tires would go flat. Starters would not start anything. The radiator would overheat or spring a leak. Wiper blades would crack and disintegrate during operation, right in front of your eyes, while your windshield fogs up reducing visibility (while you’re going 70) to near zero.

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My solution to accepting the inevitability of of mechanical failure is a AAA membership and a credit card.

Danger Lurks

Personal Danger, (assault, robbery. . .) certainly is something to be wary of on the road, though I do think using common sense can minimize the danger of encountering it. For instance, we’ve all seen or heard about the ghostly hitchhiker. Solution: Don’t stop to pick one up. What about homicidal truck drivers, like in Spielberg’s first film Duel? Avoid road rage of any kind by assuming that the other car/truck is always right, and you never are. But what if you’re in the right? Reality check: Do you want to be right or do you want remain alive?

Image of a Motel/cocktail lounge in some forgotten town out west, used to illustrate the Dangers of the Road part of Jim Arnold's post Five Cons to Taking a Road Trip
You might be tempted to enter. Then again. . .what kind of “games” are we talking about?

Try to avoid highway rest stops for extended visits (though even I sometimes take naps at those — but try to park away from other people). Beware of large truckstops which may be magnets for individuals with criminal intent. In Native American country, there’s always the Skinwalker.

Another form of danger: Bad Weather – thunderstorms, blizzards or other snow, tornados, searing heat, hurricanes, etc. Most of these can seem to appear out of nowhere. I once had to outflank several funnel clouds while driving in New Mexico, in the middle of nowhere, with no shelter or buildings of any kind in sight. Harrowing! Perhaps even more problematic when you usually live in a benign climate (like Southern California, where I live) and suddenly encounter “real” weather.

Nutrition is a Challenge

It takes a lot of planning, preparation and then replenishing to bring your own healthy food, though it’s doable. I’ve taken trips with the cooler stocked up and it’s turned out great. It’s an extra layer to your packing for the trip but worth it. I prefer to eat food I’ve prepared myself, knowing what’s in it and all that. I’d usually prep two meals per day plus bottled water and snacks, and then splurge with one meal bought on the road.

Options along the interstates are usually unhealthy fast food, or even worse, in those little stores attached to gas stations – that packaged dreck they sell can only loosely be called “food.” Heart attack in a bag. Stroke in a sack. Diabetes disaster in wait. So you have to choose carefully, though if you’re lucky enough to be passing a city while the hunger urge strikes, you probably can find something awesome.

In my new, mostly-true memoir of a road trip (Wanderslut 1996: A Gay Road Trip Across America), I do talk about my food choices, though it was a long time ago. I’ve gotten much healthier since then! You can also probably find more than five cons to taking a road trip!

Cover of Jim Arnold's Kindle book Wanderslut 1996: A Gay Road Trip Across America, used in blog post Five Cons to Taking a Road Trip
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Five Reasons to Take a Road Trip

For long distances, especially cross regions or across country, getting behind the wheel sounds decidedly inconvenient and unpleasant. It would seem much nicer to settle into a comfy airliner seat, take a nap and then – voila, you’re landing in a place it would have taken many hours or a couple of days to drive to.

View from the Bay Bridge into San Francisco, from a car, taken by author Jim Arnold, illustration for Five Reasons to Take a Road Trip.
On the Bay Bridge heading into San Francisco.

As nice as that may be, there are benefits to covering your tracks the old fashioned way. Here’s just five reasons to take a road trip:

Scenery

The geography of the United States is stunning as well as varied. You can fly high over the Rockies on a clear day and see the mountains and snow, but the raw experience of actually driving through a mountain district is something everyone should experience at least once.

The pine scent, coming up on a sudden snow squall, a small herd of deer at the side of the highway, even the slush at the exit to a rest stop are all part of the sensual journey through a real landscape. You don’t get that from staring down from 35,000 feet.

That’s just one example – substitute mountains for desert, or desert for coastline, and you get the idea.

People

On a plane, you might meet somebody from, let’s say, Albuquerque. They may give you the resident’s silver dollar description of the highlights and lowlights of their town. A richer experience is to chat up, say, a waiter at a diner, who can give you a local’s opinion of one must-see sight before you have to drive out of town, in a way that only the local can tell it.

Or, you may see people that upend what you previously thought about a particular place. For instance, in driving through Kansas, I’ve seen cowboys. Stetsons, jeans, boots, something I thought might be reserved for a place like Texas. In Kansas I thought I’d see overalls only. So, a road trip can be a stereotype-buster.

Regional Food

I guess an airline could serve you some version of regional cuisine. But, of course, it would be dry, probably either overheated or cold, and be overpriced. No comparison at all with going to a restaurant on the ground that serves authentic local cuisine.

Also, food that’s mass produced like something for a chain or an airline has little incentive to be innovative or surprising. Independent restaurants in out of the way places are the exact opposite. Whether it’s Texas barbecue, Cajun recipes in Louisiana, seafood in New England or Americanized German or Scandinavian dishes in the upper Midwest, you find delicious authenticity on the road.

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Serendipity

A relaxed road trip sets up perfect circumstances for serendipity to happen. Most often for me this has meant coming across something in the landscape that I did not know was there, but yet it turned out to be the perfect thing for the time and place.

Blogger and author Jim Arnold at Devil's Tower in Wyoming in 1996. Illustration for blog post Five Reasons to Take a Road Trip.
The blogger at Devil’s Tower, Wyoming, in 1996.

I was off the main roads to get to Mt. Rushmore; then I realized that an iconic image from a movie I loved (Devil’s Tower in Wyoming, from Close Encounters of the Third Kind) was within easy driving distance of where I was, so I could include that on my itinerary. Or, meeting a sexy guy by chance in Boston, who turns out to live in Denver, a stop on my journey. He turned out to be a fortuitous tour guide and well, a lot more. Which brings me to:

The Kindness of Strangers

Especially now in our hyper-partisan world, it’s pretty easy to lump huge swaths of territory into stereotypes. On a road trip we’re reminded that people are individuals, and most often, friendly and hospitable.

Jim Arnold in New Orleans courtyard, 1996. Illustration for blog post Five Reasons to Take a Road Trip.
Blogger waking up to a cup of coffee in a New Orleans courtyard in 1996.

The very nature of a road trip — you’re in a car that must stop for gas and food and rest, at least at some point — makes it likely that you’ll come in contact with locals, who can add a tremendous amount of color to a journey through a particular area. Whether it’s an historical perspective, a suggestion for a restaurant, or directions to your next stop via much more interesting back roads, it’s the people who live there that give a region its personality. Definitely something you can’t get from reading about an area or flying high above it.

Those were just Five Reasons to Take a Road Trip, though there are many more. To find out what I found on my own road trip, check out my new book Wanderslut 1996: A Gay Road Trip Across America.

Cover of Jim Arnold's book Wanderslut 1996: A Gay Road Trip Across America

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