C. Foxy Belle

As a single man, I’ve on occasion found myself alone on holidays, most notably the end of the year rituals of Thanksgiving and Christmas.

In our culture, these tend to be over-marketed as nuclear family-centric events, so it takes a little creativity when one is on one’s own, and can’t be with loved ones/family because of distance or whatever reason. The culture will do its level best to try and make you feel miserable, because all the images you see will be of things you’re not doing. You are unloved and, you’re a loser! So it takes some fortitude to prevail – yet I know you will – because you are a strong, independent person.

Here are some tips, from my own experience or from others who’ve shared over the years:

• Feast, but with family of choice. Takes preplanning – you probably have some idea that other friends in your orbit might be solo come that day, too – so make plans to spend the day together. Dinner optional.
• Volunteer – there’s always gonna be someone more miserable than you, and it’s a good thing to do, regardless. Homeless shelters and other organizations often have Thanksgiving Dinners where they need volunteers – perhaps that’s you.
• Day Trips – it’s great day to go local, ‘cause nobody else is doing it, but the trains and buses are still operating. Beaches, parks, trails – mostly deserted.
• Movies – Go early and often. Studios time their best hopes for the year-end holiday and awards-qualifying season – so there’s always fresh and anticipated fare the week of Thanksgiving.

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• Gym – it’s usually open for a few hours, again when a lot of people are gorging themselves on turkey and football. You might have the place to yourself, or to yourself and that like-minded person who is also alone on Thanksgiving (and wants some company . . .)
• Home Improvement Projects – maybe not what you want to do on your day off, but I once wallpapered the kitchen on Christmas Day.
• Yoga/Spiritual Practice – meditation, yoga (podcast if there are no classes!), your church. Good to give thanks, after all, that’s what it’s for. Speaking of which:
• Gratitude List – make a list of all the things you’re grateful for, and realize what a wonderful life you are living, even if you happen to be alone this one Thanksgiving Day.
• Diner Delight – a lot of restaurants are closed, but a lot are open, serving up that turkey a zillion different ways. Your servers at such places probably wish they were home with their loved ones. So patronize them, and tip well for all the service they give you all year long. That glow you leave with won’t be heartburn!
• Self-indulgence: It’s a day off, right? So pamper yourself – have your very own little day spa, bubbly bath at home with candles, lotions, sleep/nap, self-loving of the intimate variety (yeah, masturbation, boys and girls! That’s right!) chocolates, flavored expensive coffees or drinks (if you do that). Find out what the most expensive coffee drink is at the coffee shop of your choice, and order it. And tip the barista twice that for all they for you all year.

Happy Thanksgiving, whatever it is you’re doing!