a last look

When my mother died several years ago, at the end of the service the priest came down the steps to where her ashes were lying, and said to us all, “this is where we say our final goodbye.”  This was the one thing at the funeral which physically shocked me, as in, I had no intention of doing that, I didn’t want to say goodbye, not then, not ever. But after I thought about what he said, in the ensuing weeks and months, I realized the priest was right. Mom had gone on, and it was time for us to live our lives while remembering her.

My niece Alma was at that funeral and read something there. My mother told me once that she felt a special connection to this particular granddaughter, that there was a wavelength on which they communicated that was different from the rest.

I did not know Alma well. For her entire life I lived in California, while she grew up in Milwaukee and New Orleans. There are two stories about her I remember vividly, one told to me and one I witnessed. Continue reading →